Velocipedisms (1869)

Velocipedisms

Velocipedestrianisticalistinarianologist is the latest addition to the language.

A Troy military company talk of making a parade on velocipedes the coming season.

How to ride a velocipede – straddle a saddle, then paddle and skedaddle.

Velocipede butter is common in Minnesota – worked by Norwegians with their feet.

“Velocipede” lays three languages under contribution for its composition. The German furnishes “viel,” much; the English “hoss,” well known in its meaning; and the French “pied,” foot, from all of which it appears that velocipede is merely “much-hess-afoot.

In Pittsburg, the velocipede is called the lightning-catcher. In St Paul they style it the “Go-Devil.” In New York, “The New Sensation.” In Boston, “The Fiery, Untamed Steed.” In Baltimore, “The Wooden Dexter.” In Chicago, “The Wooden Devil.”

A Providence merchant went out velocipede riding a few days ago. Desirous to show his skill in turning a corner, he put on too much speed, turned the guide post the wrong way, went into a shop window, cut his nose, frightened the customers, was arrested, taken away from his bicycle, paid $125 damages, recovered his steed and rode home a sadder if not wiser man.

Professor Brady, late of the 7th Regiment Gymnasium, is the champion acrobatic. He can urge the bicycle at full speed along any sort of course, from Nicholson pavement to a tightrope. Brady challenges to race all comers with his head in a sack, his feet in flower barrels, and his hands tied behind his back.

Exciting, if not comfortable – An elderly gentleman has invented a one-wheeled velocipede, which is quite a novelty. It does away with seat, brakes, peddles and all. There is a crank attached to the axle on each side of the wheel. You sit between the spokes and turn the crank with your hands. The rider goes round with the wheel, turning a somersault at each revolution. The sensation is therefore peculiar and the ride is much more exciting than on the ordinary velocipede. The objection to this style is, they can never be used by ladies.

Something like an adventure – The Herald is responsible for the following: – At Jacksonville, recently, a Mr Dunlap, while exercising at Professor Grover’s Hall, accidentally rode down an inclined plane to a level with the window sill, passed through the open window and leaped an alley ten feet wide. He alighted with his veloce on the roof of a drug store, a storey lower, and the machine rode down the roof and over the eaves, landing on the roof of Ayres’ Bank. At this stage of the proceeding. Mr Dunlap fell off the veloce and was saved from a terrible death thereby. A large crowd witnessed the perilous ride from the windows.

The Belfast News-Letter, May 11, 1869

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